I have a second interview tomorrow for a job I really, really want.
I'm going to behave as though it's my job to lose. And I'm not going to lose it.
Hell, if someone I haven't even met (but for whom I have a genuine respect), can believe in me. I sure as hell can find a way to believe in myself long enough to put myself in a situation to be successful for once in my life.
Over the holiday weekend I watched a lot of TV. Too much, actually. I watched a shitload of football and movies. I watched the Star Wars Trilogy. Twice. This is from the Empire script. It's the scene where Yoda lifts Luke's X-Wing from the swamp. And I love it.
Annoyed at the disturbance, Luke looks over at Artoo, who
is rocking urgently back and forth in front of him.
Artoo waddles closer to Luke, chirping wildly, then scoots
over the edge of the swamp. Catching on, Luke rushes to the
water's edge. The X-wing fighter has sunk, and only the tip of
its nose shows above the lake's surface.
LUKE: Oh, no. We'll never get it out now.
Yoda stamps his foot in irritation.
YODA: So certain are you. Always with you it cannot be done. Hear you
nothing that I say?
Luke looks uncertainly out at the ship.
LUKE: Master, moving stones around is one thing. This is totally
YODA: No! No different! Only different in your mind. You must unlearn
what you have learned.
LUKE: (focusing, quietly) All right, I'll give it a try.
YODA: No! Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try.
Luke closes his eyes and concentrates on thinking the ship
Slowly, the X-wing's nose begins to rise above the water.
It hovers for a moment and then slides back, disappearing once
LUKE: (panting heavily) I can't. It's too big.
YODA: Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hm?
Luke shakes his head.
YODA: And well you should not. For my ally in the Force. And a
powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. It's energy
surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we...(Yoda pinches
Luke's shoulder)...not this crude matter. (a sweeping gesture) You must
feel the Force around you. (gesturing) Here, between you...me...the
tree...the rock...everywhere! Yes, even between this land and that
LUKE: (discouraged) You want the impossible.
Quietly Yoda turns toward the X-wing fighter. With his eyes
closed and his head bowed, he raises his arm and points at the
Soon, the fighter rises above the water and moves forward
as Artoo beeps in terror and scoots away.
The entire X-wing moves majestically, surely, toward the
shore. Yoda stands on a tree root and guides the fighter
carefully down toward the beach.
Luke stares in astonishment as the fighter settles down
onto the shore. He walks toward Yoda.
LUKE: I don't...I don't believe it.
YODA: That is why you fail.
And what if you find a way to believe? This is someone's nifty editing job. What would have happened if Luke had actually found a way to do, rather than do not.
If Master Yoda says to believe, well shit, you gotta believe then don't you.
I'll keep you posted.